Week 4 | I graduated...

Sonntag, 22 March 2015

Le guys

Berit invited us over to her house for a simple birthday lunch/cake session on her birthday's eve. Plus it was Sunday, so what better way to spend the day with a few friends over aye? Berit made a really huge batch of brownies which I ate.. a lot of.. *guilty* and I even took some home.. twice. Hahaha! Sorry, it was just too good and I'm "helping" her to finish them all before they go bad. We played a few rounds of "Bullshit" which is a game of lying with poker cards. 

I even took my polaroid camera but I forgot to bring extra films with me and ended up I just took one, without me in it. Sad, but nevermind, I'm not the star of the day so it does not matter. :)


Montag, 23 March 2015

Throwing pebbles in the lake
Who got the montag blau aye? I didn't have classes on Monday so I was pretty bored. Alvaro, Berit and I went for a little walk in the afternoon since it was sunny. The sun feels really good on the skin when you're constantly surrounded with cold air. 
I also tried throwing pebbles on the water surface but it didn't even skipped once. Alvaro was pretty good at it and he even threw a gigantic one but still it skipped a few times. I have no talent in this. Hahaha.

And suddenly, some wild swans and ducks appeared!! 

Swan used WALK ON LAND!!!

You chose APPLE! 

It is very effective! 

But you ran out of APPLEs... 

You use ESCAPE!


Okay, I'm cutting all the crap now. But seriously though, it was kind of scary because I don't think swans are quite the friendly creature like cats or dogs. I don't wanna risk breaking an arm or what. LOL. I ended up feeding them my apple, I didn't know swans like apples, but they were going crazy for it. This one even came up to me and demanded for more and bite my bag. I figured it was time for me to get up and get the hell out of there as calmly as possible. No sudden movement. Hah. It is a rare experience though. You can't really see wild swans in Malaysia. Never in Malaysia #1.

During our walk around the lake near the Hochschule, we found out that there's this little farmbeside the lake. It was kind of cool, because... it's a random field and you can see all these livestock there. I don't even need to go to a zoo! So weird. Never in Malaysia #2.

Yes, this is a pony. This little one is a bit different though, it looked depressed and it was just so far away from the other ponies. Maybe it is depressed. 

Suddenly, all the animals ran toward this man. We were quite surprised because at first all the animals were quite calm, doing their own things but then all of a sudden, they ran. Maybe he is the owner of the livestock, so they recognize his smell or something?

This little angel is very adorable too. 
I hope they don't sue me for taking pictures of her and posting it on my blog though. XD
After being in Germany, I take lawsuits pretty seriously.... though.. Never in Malaysia #3.

And suddenly, I decided to post a picture of a dead rabbit right after some pictures of a cute little girl. We found two lying dead on the ground actually. Not sure what happened, Berit suggested maybe it was the fox. I was like "WHAT?? FOX????" Because obviously, Never in Malaysia #4. We don't have foxes running freely.

I think I need to make a new hashtag title, it will be the new thing. #NIM which stands for Never In Malaysia. Get it? Get it?!? Hahaha!

We even hunted one down (well, not hunted, just observed I guess) because I was really curious. All the rabbits I've ever seen are the tame ones and they don't run away from you. They just sit there in the cage and just do whatever they want. However, the wild ones... they are so much faster. Omg, the speed. Just out of my expectation even though of course I have heard the story of "The Turtle and The Hare". #NIM #5 We definitely don't have rabbits or hare running freely out in the open too.


Dienstag, 24 March 2015

My results are finally out too! Yes, I have officially graduated! Well, technically, not until I attend the graduation ceremony. It's so stupid because I get a B on the easiest subject, every single time. HAHAHA! Because I don't attend classes and basically, I don't give any effort in studying them too and I was so wrong to do that. They are basically free As but I just threw it away like that. 

But anyway, if you noticed, I'm graduating with first-class honours! WOOHOO!!! NO PAYING BACK TO PTPTN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I never thought I could make it but I did. Seriously though, I'm always so laid back in the past 4 years. It felt like a blur to me now. Of course, there are times I felt really stressed and pressured to get good grades for it but.. after awhile, I didn't have the motivation anymore. I just take things as they come and just go with the flow. And I landed exactly where I want to be...? Well, not exactly, I'm still not sure what path to take after this. My next big decision is my career path that I'm supposed to take. Yes, I'm 23 this year and yes, I don't know what I want to do because I'm simply following the typical Asian path. 

Guide to growing up as a typical Chinese:
Step 1. Get good grades at Mathematics.
Step 2. Study in Engineering/Medicine/Law field. 
Step 3. Get a job, work like a cow, earn many many money to buy a house/car.
Step 4. Get married. Have kids. Spend your money on building a family. 
Step 5. You die.

It's a sad story but it's true. It ain't easy in Malaysia because the pay is like shit and you spend like crazy for your living expenses. I kind of feel jealous of the people in Europe (and Denmark) though. Of all the stories I heard for the past 3 weeks from my new found friends. I mean, like the government gives free education to the children even for their tertiary education. Living expenses are given by the government too for the undergraduates and it's not a small amount. Free health treatment, free insurance, free lawyers for students, free everything. But of course the taxes are really high, like 40-50% but it's fair when you think about it. My friend even has a place of her own with her boyfriend and she's only a year older than me (and she is still studying!). It is a normal thing in her country, I mean young people moving out and have a place of their own. But in Malaysia, having your own place? It's a big deal. I don't think the norms can even afford one unless they have worked for a few years in a really high-paying company.

BB1M? Please, that sounds like a joke if I say that out loud to the others. RM250 for a year. Seriously? People are getting EUR400-600 per month, for studying. And don't even get me started on the food expenses here. In Malaysia, I can easily reach up to RM80+ for each grocery trip. Here? The max I could spent was EUR30. And I was able to feed myself for the rest of the week. 

Don't want to say liao, banyak kek sim liao. Sigh. If I keep on going, I don't think I'm gonna stop. I'm not sure what my next step of life is. I have this mentality to find a job here but I don't think it will work out because my German is not that good and MUET definitely doesn't count. It's not even recognize outside of Malaysia. Why shouldn't MMU just make their students take IELTS or TOEFL instead? MUET is just stupid, that cert is not going to get you anywhere except for Malaysia. But of course, my English is not that good either nowadays, my vocabulary has been deteriorating, I barely used it for communication back at home. I usually just use them when ordering Starbucks. Yeah, sigh. 

I think I went a big off-topic there and somehow I typed out a few paragraphs of rants and disappointment. I swear, I'm gonna make it out there. Somehow, someday, I am gonna do it, by hook or by crook. 


 Mittwoch, 25 March 2015

Fountain in Zwinger Park

Kinzig River

Pet cemetary
Cycled around for awhile in the morning before going to class. I was feeling very guilty because I was eating way too much for the past week. Like heavily. Buying junk foods and snacks and chocolates. Yeah, I think I lost control over my diet for a bit. I'm trying to get back on track on running though. After I get my proper running gears because I don't have the proper warm cloths to run in this kind of weather. 

I bet my readers are getting quite bored because I'm uploading pictures of the trees, river, greeneries, and etc. again and again and again. Hahaha. The amount of view for each of my blog post are getting lesser and lesser. But it's okay, I'm not doing it for the views anyway. My blog is becoming more like my public diary. And I'm discovering my old hobbies again. I forgot how good it is to type and express myself. 


 Donnerstag, 26 March 2015

So fascinated by the tram, so I decided to take pictures. 
Went to Strasbourg to do a little shopping at Ikea and Decathlon for the day because I'm in need of warm clothes for running! And some home equipment from Ikea. We bought the EUROPASS 24H ticket and we could travel to and around Strasbourg for the day. Which was a pretty good deal I think. It costed like EUR7 per person for the whole day (if travelling in pair. If you're travelling solo, it's EUR9, which is cheap too).

I admit, I don't take the LRT much in KL because I mean... it's not convenient. Come on, you know what I mean. So, I'm kind of jakun in all these public transport thing. I've only tried to take the KTM once and that was it. It was with Michelle that time so I didn't know what I need to do to take the train, Michelle helped me around. But of course, we had this machine that checks our card ticket before we can even go into the area to board the train. Here? Wow, it's totally different. But of course, you need to buy the ticket from the Ticket Machine but you just go into the train. They trust their citizens so much, that they don't really need to check their tickets before boarding or while they are on-board. I've been on the regional train for a few times now and I've never seen anyone checking our tickets. Well, except once, in the ICE (long-distance) train. Of course, they check occasionally, but not every single time. The same for the bus too I think. 

Lol,  a picture with the IKEA shuttle bus. Credits to Berit for this picture

The fruit jam is unlimited in IKEA Strasbourg!!!!
No matter where, Ikea meatballs are still Ikea meatballs. And another surprise that I saw is this. The jam pump! It's unlimited! Yessshhh, nau I can haz as many as me wantttttt. Hahaha. They should do this in Malaysia too instead of limiting the amount of jam for every customer. Well, maybe they are taking precaution to avoid the Malaysians from tapao-ing the jam back home in their own containers. 

Decathlon trip was interesting too. I bought quite a number of stuff today. And it was my first time scanning my own purchases! Yesssss, fully automated and of course I paid using card therefore, no need for cashier. It's really fun, I have to say. 

After shopping, it's time for a quick coffee break, then back home we go.

Just us being silly. Hahaha!

The building they have there is so much different than the ones I'm used to in Offenburg. They feel more... rigid. I guess. And very old-schooled. Oh, the food and beverage in Strasbourg are very expensive too. Of course, it's expected. It's a tourist spot. But I found so many Japanese restaurants and I was so tempted to go in. Well, I have a lot of chance to eat Japanese food in the future, so.. I think I need to have a better self-control. 
Well, it's not much of a trip but I'll go back there again next time and do some real tourist-y sight-seeing activity then. 


Warning, emo post starting.. 
Just close this browser while you can, so that you don't have to bore yourself with my nonsense. 

In the past few days, I've been having these thoughts again. Maybe I'm over-thinking but I'm constantly condemning myself on how I was acting. I admit, my EQ is very low. I've never really tried to fix this. I have low tolerance towards bullshits and people and so, it's quite hard for me to make really good friends. *Hah* I don't know. I've seen the others, they are so kind and warm and they think of others first before themselves. I feel like I'm such an asshole because I don't think the same way. All the time, I was just thinking about what's best for me instead of others. So, I always make these choices that only makes me happy instead of everyone. I always choose to piss people off instead of fixing the problem. :S

Well, for example, it's so hard to plan to go out on a trip together with everyone else because some of them don't really respond well and some are always putting aeroplane. They say they want to go, but in the end, like the very end, they say they are not going. I don't like being pulled back by others and also I like people being straight forward instead of beating around the bush. I mean come on, if you can't go or don't wanna go, just say it straight away. Don't make it hard on everybody else. And if it's a "maybe", well, just say "Maybe I'll go" instead of "Yes" and then last minute "Sorry, I'm not joining". HUMANS... WHY? I don't understand. Maybe they think they are being polite, but I think it is not. Seriously, it's the opposite effect. I usually don't say anything and just ignore them. Just plan without thinking about their existence. And therefore, this leads me to not being able to make more friends. LOL. I don't try to make things work out for everyone either but of course, that's just me. Well, you can't force yourself to become what you are not I guess. 

I don't try to talk to people too. Well, at first I do. But sooner or later, I become more reserve I think. I don't really know what to say all the time and I don't really try to build a friendly relationships with all of the people I met. I try, but I'll get bored and tired easily and then I'll just give up. I need to muster up a lot of effort to socialize. It tires me out. Besides, I have no idea what to say either. Small talks? Hmm.. Not really my thing. 

I apologize if my readers are offended. I like to express myself like this instead of saying it face to face to someone else. Because I don't wanna offend them straight in the face. Some may think I'm being childish to always rant behind someone's back and not telling them straight away what their problems are. Let me tell you one thing though, not many people are that accepting. I mean, I don't think anyone would like to hear an acquaintance telling you off straight in the face and tells you what you're doing is not polite or not correct. There is no wrong or right way of doing things. It's just personal preference. And this is mine. Also, I don't have the guts to tell people what I think because I know, some people can't and won't take it in the "good" way... This is me over-thinking again I guess. Sigh. People's perceptions and relationships, they baffle me. 

It feels really good to be alone some times. You don't have to think of anything and just focus on "me" time which I always appreciate. Maybe I should stop trying to be this person that I am not. I feel so bad right now because I'm constantly comparing myself to the others and always think that "hmmm, maybe I should do this so I seem nicer... or maybe this.. so that people like me.. or maybe this...". All these needs to just stop. You know what? If I don't want to talk to anyone, it is okay. I don't need to do anything to please anyone. Life is too short. I just have to accept myself and just do whatever feels right to me. The end. Life are full with problems, and you can't expect to solve all of the problems that you encounter. Maybe, they don't even need solving. Maybe I'm just looking it at a wrong way. I don't know. This topic is too deep and all of these thoughts are from me anyway. Even for one person's thought, I'm constantly at a battle with myself. Huh, no wonder I can't handle other people, because I can't even handle my own yet. 

I think it's time for me to hit the bed instead of thinking and ranting too much. It's 1.22am now, and it's the first time ever I'm sleeping this late in Germany. Insomnia is here again. Well. goodnight.

No comments:

Post a Comment