and I have ate so many things today. Keep nom nom nom nom nom nom. Not hungry, but mouth is itching to eat every second. If not, I just feel like lying down on the bed and fantasize about things and sleep. -.- Not a good way to live if we're talking about long-term. This only happens when I have to study.

oh nom nom nom nom nom.

And yes, I look like this today. At home. Where I am magnificently and incredibly beautiful as I am. 
Btw, I can't get sarcasm these days. Was it really meant to hurt me or just make me ridicule myself? Huh, whatever, I already did the latter. AHAHAHA, mere words can't hurt me!! THAT'S BECAUSE I AM GONNA.. go back to studying. 

phew phew phew phew pheeeeewww


Back to Shah Alam home. 

Feeling very lazy to study for midterm. Sigh. 
Will be having 3 labs and 3 midterms next week. :( 
And I haven't yet complete my study for any subject. Hurrah. 
Shyt. Friday, Saturday and Sunday. One subject for each day!?!? EHMERGERRDDD

I munch a lot when I study.
I want some seaweed popcorn right now.


The first time I've ever seen so many students cramped up in the lecture hall.
So much for the "compulsory" thing, and how important this talk is to us. I didn't even know it exist until I heard my coursemate said something about serious punishment for not attending the talk. Well, all those are of course bullshits lecturers said to make sure we attend the talk. Head counts. That lady right there is very enthusiastic to make us interested in being "the leader of the future" or something something. I'm sorry, I couldn't take it, I went back home after sitting there for almost an hour. I don't think it can motivate me very well.
Although, Soon Fatt said I have missed the most interesting part of the day. Where a student was debating with the old lady right there. Aww....

True and good friends are so hard to find. Nowadays, people just like to use other people. Is that what friends are for? Seriously, I'm getting sick of some people stepping on my head. I don't even feel like bothering some people anymore. I think it's best if I just leave them alone and distance myself from them. This world is so sick. 

Boyfriend versus Friends

I'm taking a break from my slow progress of studying to doodle something and share some thoughts.

I have seen people that I know, puts their relationship waaaaay ahead of their priority list. I'm wondering which type of "friend" I am when I'm in a relationship. I used to say "bros before hoes" *well, it's kinda funny if a girl uses this phrase. Cause I don't know which one I should categorize as bros or hoes* which basically just means friends first before our other half.

During high school time, I really did put my friends first before all my ex-es. That's because I wasn't really in serious relationships back then, I couldn't find the one which I would really.. well, fall in love with. 
But this time, it's different.

Honestly, I would drop anything to spend some time with him. I would miss my fortnight trip back to my hometown. I would rather go and see him than go back to my hometown to meet with my friends. I would reject my mum's invitation to have dinner during the weekend. I would put my home-works and assignment on hold. I would drive to another state alone without the consent of my mother (driving limitation issues). Oho, I've changed so much. I didn't know I had that in me. 
Mostly, I get to spend the weekends with him when he's back to Malaysia, hmm.. maybe one or twice a month I guess when there are special occasions or so. When I got back to Cyberjaya to resume my campus life, it's like I got pulled out from my dream-like world and back to the shitty reality. I think I have read too much manga and watched too much dramas, because all of them makes me thinks that life just revolves around love and stuff but not about other things that matters also.

I digress. 

Okay, I often see girls put their love life first and then they slowly disappear from their friends. Well, because they are too "busy" for them. Most of them just last for a few months, because the relationship is still fresh. Then they become more involved with their usual friends again. But I do know worse cases that a girl can be in. When one is too attached to their other half, this happens...

"Hey, wanna have breakfast tomorrow? I haven't see you in awhile now!"
"Oh, hey. Ya, I think I can't. I have to help my mum/have to fetch my sister/have to watch over my sick dog/pet hamster died/sister's pet hamster died/pet cactus died/the sun burns my skin/etc."

"Hey wanna have dinner tonight? We should meet up, it's been ages!"
"Oh haaaaaiii! I would love to! But unfortunately I have a night curfew/dinner with family/my house stinks, I have to clean/I can't go out on a rainy night/my mum forbids me/chuchupickachu/etc."

And then moments later, a friend would come and tell you that they saw this friend going out with their boyfriend. Apparently, you are not good enough to know the truth. I wonder why some people like to hide it so much. It's not like doing anything wrong. LYING is obviously wrong.
Then on one fine day, this girl and her guy decided to break up. So, this girl starts to cry a lot and sulk everyday. Then begins to find her once close friend to make her feel better.
I don't really have a friend like that. Or I have to say, I don't count them as my friends. No. They should realize and know that they are the one who throw their friends out of their life first. They should repent and deserve the same treatment that they gave to other people. 

At least I can proudly say that I am not that kind of a person who would make up excuses and lie to my friends that I would be busy hanging out with my boyfriend. I swear I will not become one of those people. Because I believe friends are as important as our other half or even family. We spent most of our life with our friends too, so don't ever forget that fact.

26/11/12 Negative

Rushed back to Cyberjaya today from Shah Alam home. I'm so used to sleeping 8 hours plus everyday, I can't seem to focus the next day at all. My vision blurred, my mind lazy, and I just feel like eating. =.=
I skipped 3 hours worth of class today, again, the pattern of skipping classes are beginning to start again. I only skipped those class that I feel will make no difference if I were to attend to. 
Lab today.. but..
How wonderful, they waited till the last minute to inform us. Zz

Fooled around once I got home, I didn't even took a nap, I regretted that. 
Went to Puchong for dinner at Penang One, Char kuey teow is damn nice, but it is still my No. 2 fav CKT. No. 1 will always be the midnight CKT in my hometown. Oh, how I yearn for the one-hour-wait-for-ckt. Lol yeah, need to wait one hour for the order to be complete. Everytime.

Thank you SoonEn
These are delicious, I don't always eat chocolate, but lately I've been eating it a lot more than I used to. I guess I just need more happy chemical inside of me. Because I feel like shit today, -.-. Very shitty indeed. That's why this post is named "Negative".

25/11/12 Mum's Birthday

Here's a random gif I've created from my mum's birthday 

Shit, this is too small. I didn't realize it until I upload it using Gifboom. :( Why don't they have settings which I could change the size!?!
Oh, by the way, she was trying to touch her nose and then her chin with her freakishly long tongue during our Korean lunch at Daorae. 

Spent the day doing my lab report which I have to hand in tomorrow. Too bad I didn't start my studying yet. Which I should probably get started very soon because I don't want to fail my midterm test for every subject. I'm too good in finding things to do to avoid being very involve in self-studying. 

For the evening, we went to The Garden for this ride.

X-rider, 4D motion ride 
 Mum was very happy that she bought 4 tickets for RM28 from the online discount site. It normally cost RM20 per person. But if you buy 3, they'll give you one for free. That means it's RM60 for 4 people. The ride only can fit 4 people per ride, and the ride lasted for 5 minutes. There are many varieties of "movies" you can choose from, but just go with the one they recommended, because they know the rides well. I got on the ride twice. It's fun, but not sure if it's worth the RM20 though.
Oh, if you're a girl which is urm.. well-endowed, you have been warned. Because hell, I feel very uncomfortable during the ride and it itched after the ride ended. Oh, and make sure you don't eat too full before the ride! I felt a bit nausea after it too
Suckers for Peppermint mocha frapp

Cendol from Nyonya Colours @ Midvalley/The Gardens
I didn't know about the existence of this delicacy until I heard my housemate recommend it to me on one fine day when I said out loud that I have a sudden craving for cendol. Straight to Nyonya Colours when I had the chance and sat down ordered this and indulged in this sweet and delicious dessertl! It's very sweet but yet a little bitter at the end of every spoonful, I like it.

This is the best at could do at enlarging a very small gif.
"Oppa, gangnam style~"

Personal things, too much!

Nope, I guess I can't really express everything everyday right here. Because there's always something on my mind that I have to think about, and it's always personal, I don't feel like sharing it to the people, because I would feel "too read-ible" some how.  And some times what I think may be too emotional and might piss other people off or maybe make them uncomfortable. So, I'm not doing that either.

Besides, I'm sure that people are glad I didn't post it publicly for them to read. Some things are better left not known. I'm sure people are hiding things from me as well, and it would make me feel better if I don't know anything. And the better if I don't even know you're hiding things from me. "hide-ception"

It's getting merry in Sunway Pyramid

It's December soon.  
It's Christmas soon.
It's my birthday soon. 
It's New Year soon. 

So little time, so much to do!

Taobao Haul

Taken from my insta @joeyk2512

Finally, our taobao products have arrived! And it only took 2 weeks for these babies to be flown and delivered to our doorstep. I'm satisfied at all the products, that goes the same for my housemates too. Taobao really have many cheap stuff (especially phone covers) and there are many to choose from. *We didn't ordered those RMB1.00 one since they are TOO cheap and I'm sure the quality isn't that good too, so people, shop wisely* We bought more than these in the picture actually, but it's private and confidential. Haha. Some products are still missing though. Will have to ask the dealer again. 

I wonder why I didn't buy more covers for myself. I've noticed that I only bought one and the others were for my mum, brother, and boyfriend. -.-'

If you are interested in buying, make sure you find a good taobao agent! No, you can't buy directly from taobao because payment are made with their own currency and bank. 
In case you want to have a go with it, here's the agent we contacted - gurlzlovefashion@hotmail.com

Scam or not?

Update on 27th Dec 2012
Apparently, one of my friend did made some money from it. But that's all thanks to her big social circle and she found many downlines so it's profitable. But for my other friend, I'm afraid it's not that well for her. She's struggling to find downlines, and since many are members already, that makes it harder and more competition. She took her money back but it took at least one month and clicking on ads everyday to take earn it back. And I heard the company are changing their tactics and way of doing things so it's not so profitable and easy.
My advise is, if you have a great big circle of friends who is easy to recruit in this quick money scheme and is willing to join you to take risk then maybe you can play for awhile. Otherwise, better go take some part time jobs instead.


So recently, there's this new hot thing that has been spreading around my friends. A new way to earn money fast and I can just do it in my own home. Easy right? I'll just spare 5 mins everyday to click 5 ads to earn RM5. Too easy in fact. 

But no. I don't trust these fast-money thing. Unless you know how to play the game and take the risk. I'm not a risk taker as I know I'm still a greenhorn in this "adult world". I don't know much about how the dark business world works either.
So here's some points that I like to share regarding it :

  1. You need to register as a member through your upline with RM150. Then you can start.
  2. I've done my homework. My friend who recently joined said this is a new company and this is only the first batch they have hired. But according to this, http://www.carigold.com/portal/forums/showthread.php?t=345239
    It seems like it's already begun around June 2012.
  3. When I asked about the money, it's not given to her yet since it's her first week, but the amount is stated in her (3pleA) account. Two weeks once they will pay their members via what, i do not know. 
  4. The site is just 5 months old, it's rather new. 
  5. Who is giving the money? RM1 for one click? How and why? Or do they take the RM150 registration fees from the downlines to pay for the uplines?
  6. If it's that easy to make money, why don't the people just make money clicking all the way through without recruiting members? 
  7. Have you heard any of your friends who have successfully seen the money being banked in or handed on to them?
  8. It seem's like there's not much info on the internet on 3pleA Solution except for more members doing blogpost and even posting it on forums to promote it.
  9. The site itself looks... gimmick enough for me. There's no contact number, no info about the company, not even the employer's note or blah
  10. Is it illegal or something????
  11. This recruiting member thing is done with the mouth-of-word. Suspicious?
There's just too much doubt in this fast-money scheme. Maybe it really does work, but I think it will only last for a few months before it runs away with the rest of the money. For those early members, maybe they really will make some extra incomes from this. For those downdowndowndowndownlines, well.... best of luck?

A few of my close friends are already in it, all I can say is... well.. Good luck? and run fast?

If you're curious, you can click here to see their website.

I'm inactive I know

I've been inactive for awhile again. But I'm here and there right now. I'm even back on tumblr, which do you know have very app for iPhone? Yes, I can see so many things on my phone during my classes right now. What more can I have? Another new thing that I can divert my focus during lectures. 

I'm kinda contradicting actually. 
I want my blog to be read, but I refuse to write more, because I think most of it are too personal for people to be reading. So I wrote it down in my tumblr where very very very less people know about it. So that the people I know won't have a chance to read it. But there's a little part inside of me wants to be popular blogger. Which I think, is a quite difficult task, given that... I'm too blardy negative about everything. *Turns out I'm not a very optimist person that I used to be right now*

I've also noticed the change in my blogging style from the year in my another blog, my old blog. I can like create 2-4 posts per day when I feel like it. 30 posts for December 2008, no kidding. I write what I think, what I want, what I have on my mind without caring who my readers are. Then slowly I began writing rants.. to make fun of people and their silly ways. It's enjoyable since I got many friends that would praise my "art of rants". Then I began to WANT to satisfy them instead of me by writing things for THEM and not ME. I think I've lost my way. It's not too late to turn back!

Aaaaanyway, I've decided to turn my blog into a journal. I don't care if I bore people to death cause I'm the most important audience. I like what I type, that's all I need. *muahahaha*

Physical Electronics.
Look at it. I demand you to look at the electrical, mechanical-ish and engineer-ish obscure-to-you-ordinary-people components and gadgets!!!
It's not a big deal actually. They're just.... multimeters, red blue wires, and some shits you don't have to know

Here's to start things off. I'm beginning it today. *Oh, this takes me back to the first time I created a blog account* *reminisce reminisce* 

Today was a very busy day. Because of the labs and lectures I have to go to. I don't even have time to eat until we finished the lab session. 4pm for my lunchner (lunch + dinner). I'm so taken aback of the fact that I went for lectures. I used to skip most of the classes, it's a pattern, after midterm, I'll disappear like a shadow. But the lecturers for the subjects I took are not bad, so I guess that's what changed my mind. Nahz, I lied, honestly, I read Naruto in class when it's boring. That's what keep me awake, or else I'll doze off in class.
babi weh, 11am till 7pm non-stop sial...

Came back from from class dilly dally here and there. Home is where I can do anything except studying. Oh, I accidentally dyed half of my new polyester blouse and a white shirt with bleh. *Cries* I only wore the blouse once weh. Now it's contaminated with blue blotches. Goddamnitstupidme. 

Bah, it's 12am now, I guess it's time for me to hit the bed and wake up for tomorrow's 8am class! 

The difficult stage

I can only express myself truly right here. Because I don't like to be ignored when I'm talking to a person. It's like talking to a wall. It's useless. But in my blog, I'm talking to myself. I write it down and I listen to myself. To realize things that I don't realize once i truly express it down. I don't care who reads it or who doesn't reads it. But if you're the one that I'm saying and you're reading this, I guess that will be better for me too.

... I didn't think it would be this difficult... I know this day will come sooner or later. It's normal to have a couple of small fights in a relationship. It's the beginning of these "patterns" for me now. Let me describe it in a few words.

  • Frustrating
  • Upsetting 
  • Confusing
  • and Suffocating

Not everyone is perfect. I know. Relationship is about compromising. I admit, it's hard for me to express my feelings out, this is not a new thing for me. I am THAT kind of person. It's not like *snap finger* I can become a different person that straightaway catch what someone is saying and know what to say in return at the same time.

I've been told too many times, I should change. Because I'm too ignorant. I'll admit it myself, it's true, I'm ignorant because I used to think those things aren't gonna be much help for me since I don't like it or I don't care what happens to it. When we grow up, everything changes. Whatever shit you also must know. So next time you can easily talk and socialize with people. So, we wouldn't be left out. This is for a better change right? Right. The world is sick I tell ya, must please everyone. I'm not a people-pleaser some more. It's not easy! But it's possible.
Me? I'm a pessimist you see. And I'm very protected since I was a kid. I don't even know how to take a bus by myself seriously. That's why I don't like to go out on my own to explore the world. The idea of "going out alone" is like a forbidden action. I think this is how our brain tends to interpret something from what we learn at a younger age.
I'm trying to be a better person, please give me time and support. Not aimlessly shooting me and what-not nonsense. I don't need it. That will make me more depressed, it's not a motivation (not for me at least).

Next point,
I must really emphasis on this. This is what ticks me off most of the time.
When you have a particular thing you don't specifically like about a person, don't beat around the bush or even ask the person to figure it out himself.


Point number 1.
The person himself might not notice or figure what he/she may did wrong, since he/she is accustomed to it. For example, if a person said "This is too sweet" regarding a food, person A will interpret "Really? Maybe I should try it myself to check and see if it's too sweet" and person B will interpret "I guess she don't like sweet stuff". You see, different people have different brains. You CAN'T expect a person to think the same as you.

Point number 2.
If he/she doesn't understand what he/she did wrong, how the hell can one know what one must do?
People are not psychic! Unless you somehow can split into two and two of you understand each other! Not even I understand myself, please don't expect two different person to understand each other with just eye-contact.

Point number 3
If you don't plan to end what you say then please, don't say it at all. It puzzles the other person to try and figure it out. While you sitting there, frustrated at the other person. It's a lose-lose situation. Please stick to the rules of finishing what you said  if you started it. Like I said, no two brains are the same.

EGO is also a very terrible thing. This is the biggest problem. Nobody wants to raise the white flag. But I don't think there is ever a winner in an argument. It's either two of them loses, or two of them wins.
If you don't try to understand each other, don't bother trying to ask your partner to fix themselves up because it's selfish. If you're willing to listen and understand what your partner is saying... I call that rare. But it's there, you just have to find it.

I remember someone saying "Communication is two ways". But all I see is when he's talking, I'm denying. When I'm talking, he's not listening. How?
I don't get it seriously. But at last, I reflect on my own actions after that and keep it all to myself. But when I say something, how come you choose to flip out on me and then ignore me? I can't say you're wrong, is it? Who's not listening now?

I thought loving someone is about accepting their goods and bads. But what's happening when "change" is needed. It's not easy, but maybe "changes" will solve the problem. It's kinda conflicting, don't you think?

Should we change for the purpose of being more tolerable to the person you love?
Should we accept the person you love for who he/she is? Even if it's annoying.

Whatever the answer is, I'm still very hurt right at this moment.